Us.
I don't actually know. I mean, things may have changed, one or couple of things. But nothing big, no significant changes is happening. But, God, this feeling. This feeling again. This, the feeling of being the only one holding the line. The feeling of thinking that whenever I reach for the other side, it's empty. There's nothing, just thin plain air. Why?
After everything we've been through, the ups and downs. Travel through the mountain tops or deepest sea. Walking through the rain or the sun. Facing everything with laughter or with tears. The scars or the good memories. Knowing someone - no. Having someone, believing someone, giving up a lot for someone isn't something a person can forget that easy. That's also not something a person can do often. But me, I'm willing to do that. But again, the feeling of being tethered with you, TO you, and thinking there's only emptiness where there should be you? I can't bear again, losing another person that means so much to me. I just can't. And I won't.
Loving someone, to care about someone this much, I'm risking everything. I'm putting my heart on my sleeve, literally, for you just to break it? No. I put it there, so you can take it and take good care of it. Oh, and believe me, my dear, when I say you did such a good job. And, no, people, this isn't sarcasm. :) But, you know, if you realize, lately you left my heart on your desk. Alone, dusty and rusty. You left it like you never even know what it is. What happened?
I.. Miss.. You.. So much. So much, so much it hurts me. My heart you've left unattended, dusty, is missing you more and more and more, every second. Every minute. Every breath you take, and you forget about it. It's missing you. I'm missing you. I miss the feeling of being an us. I miss knowing you're on the other side of the line, tethered to me.
I know things have been hard lately. Everything's doubling up, school's being such a pain in the ass, I'm being clingy. But I remember, you said it yourself, that you always know that it's gonna be hard. And that you're always going to try and save me. Spare me your time. You said that, you know you're busy and you know that we don't see each other as often, you only have time to rest. To sleep. But every other breathing second, you spare just for me. Okay, that's what you said. What about how I feel?
You see, I may not believe in promises. But I always, always, believe in you. I love you. :)
